Category: GPS / SS&S

GPS – The Newlywed Stage, Unity

by Rick Shrader

Note: This series will consist of five phases: Created-parenting, Pre-parenting, Parenting, Post-parenting, and Grand-parenting. Each of these phases will have four sections.

Second Phase: Pre-parenting (series articles 5-8)

Section 3. The Newlywed Stage–Unity (article #7)

“Unless the LORD builds the house, they labor in vain who build it; unless the LORD guards the city, the watchman stays awake in vain” (Psalm 127:1). Newlyweds are still not parents. They have time to settle down and get their house in order before those more chaotic years come. God has designed marital roles and responsibilities for the good and benefit of the marriage. There are three areas of vital importance that concern the couple themselves.

Headship

The Bible plainly says that, “The head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man” (1 Cor. 11:3); “For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church” (Eph. 5:23). Though many want to see “head” as source or origin, the Bible always means “authority over” whether God as head of Christ, Christ as head of the church, or the husband as the head of the wife.

In the trinity. The Godhead is not the example of the family but the family is the example of the Godhead. The persons of the trinity are seen in two relationships. Ontologically (the very being), the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit have always been equal and their titles are eternal (John 17:5). Economically (administratively), for purposes of creation history, the Son always submits to the Father and never the reverse. The Father always has “authority over” the Son and the Son always does those things that please the Father (John 8:29).

In the church. In a parallel way, Christ is always the head of, has “authority over,” the church and the church always submits to Christ, never the other way around. “And He is the head of the body, the church, who is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, that in all things He may have the preeminence” (Col. 1:18). Preeminence (prōteuō) always means “first place.” He is seated at the right hand of the Father yet highly exalted over the church.

In the family. With Paul we can say that the husband is the head of the wife as the Father is head over Christ and as Christ is head over the church. But as the trinity is equal yet distributed administratively, and as They have unique roles yet the Father loved the Son (John 17:24), so husband and wife, being equal in Christ, have unique roles. The husband loves his wife as the Father loves the Son and Christ loves the church (Eph. 5:25). This kind of headship is always tempered by understanding and honor (1 Pet. 3:7), and by Christ-like love.

Complementary

This word has been used over the past 30-40 years to describe the biblical concept of the husband-wife relationship. Albert Mohler said it succinctly when he wrote, “God enshrined in the marriage union the concept of complementarianism, which upholds the equal dignity of man and woman as both created in the image of God but complementing one another through different gender roles” (Gathering Storm, p. 69).

A definition. The English word “complement” (not “compliment”) means, “Relating to or constituting one of a pair of contrasting colors that produce a neutral color when combined in suitable proportions” (Webster).  That is a beautiful analogy of the Greek word hupotassō, to rank under, and almost always is translated “submit.” Kevin DeYoung says, “the word hypotasso occurs thirty-seven times in the NT outside Eph. 5:21, always with the reference to a relationship where one party has authority over another” (Men and Women, p. 104).

That biblical definition is consistent in various relationships. Not only does that word describe submission of wives to their own husbands (Eph. 5:22; Col. 3:18; Tit. 2:5; 1 pet. 3:1), but also the Son to the Father (1 Cor. 11:3); the church to Christ (Eph. 5:24); citizens to government (Rom. 13:1, 5); slaves to masters (Tit. 2:9); younger to elder (1 Pet. 5:5); children to parents (1 Tim. 3:4); angels to Christ (1 Pet. 3:22); and all things to God (1 Cor. 15:27-28, where the verb hupotassō is used six times). The submission of “one to another” (some call mutual submission) in Eph. 5:21, is always limited by the context of the submission. Nowhere is the husband said to be submissive to the wife. That’s why wives are to be submissive to “their own husbands” and not  to everyone else’s husband.

Roles. As in all of the above submissive relationships, the parties have different roles to fulfill. Adam’s role was to name, garden, and protect while Eve’s role was to help and reproduce. A coach is a coach and a player is a player. A General is a General and a soldier is a soldier. This doesn’t mean one is necessarily more skilled than the other (many times it is the opposite), but it does mean that fulfilling one’s position is teamwork without which nothing gets accomplished. Peter instructed husbands to realize that the wife is a weaker vessel than the husband but that both are equally “heirs together of the grace of life” (1 Pet. 3:7).

Genesis 3. Complementarity didn’t begin as a result of the fall. It began in Genesis 1 and 2 as the way God made male and female. The sin of Genesis 3 broke that relationship. Adam failed to lead and Eve failed to follow. As a result, Eve’s “desire” (teshugah, see 4:7) was to rule over her husband, and Adam’s response was to rule harshly (mashal) over Eve. “She would attempt to usurp his authority. And he would respond by trying to impose a despotic, authoritarian rule over her that would suppress her in a way God never intended” (MacArthur, What the Bible Says About Parenting, p. 186). The modern-day Christian challenge is to fix that sinful tendency with a biblical complementarian relationship.

Dominion

Men and women, made in the image of God, have joint-dominion over the earth. When the issue of roles is settled, they can move forward in the purpose for which God has brought them together.

Dominion mandate. God made human beings to be the caretakers of His creation. “Then God said, ‘Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth’” (Gen. 1:26). In verse 28 God repeated the word “dominion” and added the word “subdue.” This was easier for Adam and Eve before the fall. Yet, after the fall, this command was not rescinded, but difficulty was now added to Adam’s work of tilling the ground. In addition, this dominin was extended to Noah and his family after the flood (Gen. 9:1-7). It remained valid to David when he penned Psalm 8.

Ongoing dominion. In God’s progressive revelation to man in coming dispensations, the dominion responsibilities were modified to fit the times. McCune explains, “This program of stewardship responsibility began with the Dominion Mandate of Genesis 1:26-27 and is forwarded by the progressive, unfolding of God’s revelational light in succeeding dispensations” (Systematic Theology, I, p. 139). Some things were added (responsibility to human government) and some things were brought to an end (Mosaic law) and some things have always remained the same (the family structure).

In the dispensation of grace in which we live, local church responsibility and the great commission have become the responsibility of every believer and every family. We may live at different times and in different locations, but every family should be active members of a local church and should make their home a witness for Jesus Christ.

Setting parameters. Every Christian family in the age of grace has a part in the mandate responsibility. New couples must remember that they come from different families and backgrounds, sometimes very different. Yet, they must now blend into one family with their own convictions and habits. The newlywed stage before children come into the home and things get hectic is the time for the new couple to work these out between themselves. Here are five areas that need agreement. 1) The husband is the head of the home but the husband and wife are partners in managing the home (1 Pet. 3:7). 2) Family devotions, corporate prayer, doctrinal discussions, should be free and open in a Christian family setting (Deut. 6:4-9). 3) The local church must be the most important institution for the family outside of the home itself (Heb. 10:24-25). 4) Discipline of the children, appropriate for each age of development, must be agreed upon before the inevitable time of disobedience occurs (Prov. 23:13-14). 5) Personal separation issues for the family must be settled by husband and wife before they become a problem (2 Cor. 6:14-18). By these and future agreements, the Christian home can be the place of love, respect, help, and service to God.

“The loving complementarity, in which the husband is a Christlike, sacrificial leader and the woman his gracious, compatible partner, is vital both for a God-honoring relationship which is in keeping with God’s original vision and design but also as a basis for effective parenting.”

Andreas and Margaret Köstenberger, Equipping for Life, p. 39.

GPS – The Engagement Stage, Covenant

by Rick Shrader

Note: This series will consist of five phases: Created-parenting, Pre-parenting, Parenting, Post-parenting, and Grand-parenting. Each of these phases will have four sections.

Second Phase: Pre-parenting (series articles 5-8)

Section 2. The Engagement Stage–Covenant (article #6)

“Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning made them male and female, For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate” (Matt. 19:4-6).

Marriage is a Covenant

Marriage began in the garden of Eden before the fall. When Adam said, “This is now bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh,” he was making a total commitment to the woman God had made for him. “Therefore,” he concluded, “a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife” (notice the word “wife”).

Biblical covenants. Covenants are serious business with God. The biblical covenants are sometimes called conditional and unconditional, or bilateral and unilateral. Well-known biblical covenants are the Abrahamic, Mosaic, Davidic, and the New covenant. A covenant could be made between God and mankind or between people individually. Marriage is a biblical covenant between a man and a woman.

Biblical descriptions. Jacob said to Laban, “Come, let us make a covenant, you and I, and let it be a witness between you and me” (Gen. 31:44). This human agreement shows that a covenant was a witness to their promise. Also, regarding marriage, Proverbs describes unfaithfulness on the woman’s part as one who, “Who forsakes the companion of her youth, and forgets the covenant of her God” (Prov. 2:17). Unfaithfulness on the man’s part  toward his wife, Malachi describes as, “With whom you have dealt treacherously; yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant” (Mal. 2:14).

Modern descriptions of marriage. Marriage has become so violated today that many ignore it altogether. The Bible still calls sex before and outside the marriage covenant sin. Only the marriage bed is “undefiled, but fornicators and adulterers God will judge” (Heb. 13:4). The Roman church calls marriage a sacrament as if the vows are made to the church. Civil government calls marriage a contract, which can be broken at any time. The Bible makes marriage a life-long covenant with God as witness. That covenant is effective the moment a man and a woman give their consent in public vows. In any event, marriage is God’s creation law for all people.

The Pre-Marriage Promise

We call this time engagement but the Bible’s term is espousal or betrothal. The biblical term was more permanent than ours, but each could be broken for certain reasons. Marriage has always had two parts: the consent and the consummation. The consent is the vows and the consummation is the physical union.

The biblical promise. In biblical times, the parents usually made an agreement, along with their children, to marry. This betrothal, when it was made, was the consent, or the vows, and was considered permanent. The consummation would follow sometimes years afterward. Lenski explains, “We should understand the betrothal in the Jewish not the American sense. It was virtually marriage and lacked only that the bridegroom takes his bride to his home. The vows of the marriage were made at the betrothal, which was always public, and none were needed when the groom took away his bride” (on Luke 2:5).

A broken promise. In biblical times, a broken promise, especially by unfaithfulness sometime between the betrothal and the eventual consummation, demanded a “putting away” or divorce. Joseph thought that is what had happened with Mary when she was with child. Though she could have been stoned for her supposed adultery (Deut. 22:23-24), God had made provision for putting her away (Deut. 24:1-4). This was necessary because Joseph thought she had broken her covenant vows.

In our time, the engagement period is not the official consent, or vow. Broken engagements happen often, whether privately or publicly, without any consequences. This is a better arrangement and is often necessary for various reasons.

A human promise. Our engagement period is a promise between a man and a woman to come to the marriage altar sometime soon. Even this period should be one step in a multi-step process for a Christian single. A church youth group (or class) is good because a young person (let’s say a girl) socializes with a variety of Christian boys. Some are good and some are not. Out of the good group, perhaps much later, she may agree to “date” one of those boys. This may be brief if she sees quickly that he is not a boy she could be serious about or it may last a good while. Out of that process, perhaps much later, these two may become engaged. Sometime later they plan to marry. Even then, she may see something that shows her this is not the boy to marry and she breaks the engagement.

This whole process is good because a) a believer should only marry another believer, b) even a believer may not be the person you should marry, and c) the arrangement can be broken at any time without penalty, including the last period of engagement. As the saying goes, “He fell in love with a dimple and made the mistake of marrying the whole girl.” A boy or girl will always put on the best of manners and deportment while dating (some call this time “the tingles”). It is not until the real life of marriage begins that one may see the rest of that person. We’re not talking about intimacy, which should never be discovered until marriage, but about getting to know a person as much as possible. After marriage, the two blend together into a single life.

The Modern Covenant

Consent and consummation have been the norm for hundreds of years. Christopher Ash says, “It is precisely this bipolarity of publicity (the wedding) and intimacy (the honeymoon) that gives to marriage its stability and security” (in Marriage 226).

The marriage altar. Whereas in biblical times the consent (vows) were given earlier at the betrothal and the consummation followed much later, our consent is given at a marriage ceremony, and the consummation takes place immediately after during the honeymoon. The vows (consent) are necessary and make the marriage official. When the couple both pledge “I do,” they are officially married, both legally and spiritually. These vows should not be trivial or made to suit each person. These vows are being made with God as witness and He intends for both persons to keep these for life. The Church of England, for example, has traditional vows (since 1662) that must be said or the couple will not be officially married (Church of England official site accessed Oct, 2023). Since marriage is part of the creation order, God intends it for all human beings and limits it to one man and one woman. This is why Christians understand the importance of both the legal marriage license (for all people) and the religious Christian vows of believers before their God.

The father’s role. Paul, as the spiritual father of the church at Corinth, wrote, “For I have betrothed you to one husband, that I may present you as a chaste virgin to Christ” (2 Cor. 11:2). Also, “So then he who gives her in marriage does well” (1 Cor. 7:38). In biblical times, the father played an important role in marriage. He officially betrothed his daughter to another man in that ceremony. Our modern marriage incorporates a less official custom of the father walking his daughter down the aisle and “giving her away” to a young man. This is often preceded by the custom of that young man asking the father’s permission to marry his daughter. Every father who has been in those circumstances knows the seriousness of those customs. You are transferring the headship of your daughter to another man for life.

God as witness. Proverbs calls the marriage covenant of the young woman, “the covenant of her God” (Prov. 2:17). A minister performing a marriage ceremony ought to remind the couple that God is witnessing their sacred vows to one another. Norman Geisler said, “From these passages [Mal 2:14; Prov 2:17] it is evident that marriage is not only a covenant, but also a covenant of which God is witness. God instituted marriage, and he witnesses the vows. They are made ‘before God’” (Ethics, 301).

A young Christian man and Christian woman should understand the seriousness of the marriage covenant and vows. There is a reason for the process of becoming engaged and eventually getting married. The Christian marriage is greater than the non-Christian marriage because the Christian man and woman want to serve God together. The love is there and must be, but married life is also commitment, partnership, companionship, and a growing together in service to God. Choose wisely.

GPS – The Single Stage, Purity

by Rick Shrader

Note: This series will consist of five phases: Created-parenting, Pre-parenting, Parenting, Post-parenting, and Grand-parenting. Each of these phases will have four sections.

Second Phase: Pre-Parenting

Section 1. The Single Stage – Purity (article #5)

“But I say to the unmarried and to the widows; it is good for them if they remain even as I am; but if they cannot exercise self control, let them marry” (1 Cor. 7:8-9).

What About singleness?

Elisabeth Elliot wrote, “Single life may be only a stage of a life’s journey, but even a stage is a gift. God may replace it with another gift, but the receiver accepts His gifts with thanksgiving. This gift for this day” (Let Me Be a Woman).

A universal situation. We all start out in life single. We are born into a family situation to teach us how to live with other people. Our pre-adult years allow us to observe married life and later make a life’s choice ourselves. Most will choose marriage and family life and fewer will not. The single life comes to people in various ways. Some will choose the single life permanently, some will experience the pain of divorce and become single again, some will lose their spouse to illness or tragedy at various ages of life, and older married people will lose their spouse and find themselves alone at the end of life. There are more “singles” around than we realize. However, the decision to remain single for life is unique among these.

Biblical examples. Jesus was single and Peter was married. We know Paul as single though some believe he could have been married at one time. In defense of his single tent-making ministry, Paul said, “Do we have no right to take along a believing wife, as do also the other apostles, the brothers of the Lord, and Cephas?” (1 Cor. 9:5). Yet Paul remained single, writing, “I suppose therefore that this is good because of the present distress—that it is good for a man to remain as he is: Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed. Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife” (1 Cor. 7:26-27).

Singleness as a gift. Paul again writes, “For I wish that all men were even as I myself. But each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that. But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am” (1 Cor. 7:7-8). Jesus also said, “There are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of God’s sake. He who is able to accept it, let him accept it” (Matt. 19:12). God may give this “gift” to a few men or women, yet it does not make one superior or inferior. It is in many ways a difficult path but one that can hold many rewards in the Christian life.

God’s Will for Singles.

Christopher Ash wrote, “I know which ‘gift’ I have by a very simple test: if I am married, I have the gift of marriage; if I am not married, I have the gift of being unmarried” (Married for God). Ash’s point is simply that God has given us the circumstance we’re presently in and, until He changes it, this is His will for now. However, though a married person should not seek to be unmarried, an unmarried person may indeed seek God’s will about being married.

Single as an option. Paul wrote, “He who is unmarried cares for the things that belong to the Lord—how he may please the Lord” (1 Cor. 7:32). Paul is not placing one above the other, he is merely stating the facts. A single person is free from marriage responsibilities and can do things the married person cannot, or, as in verse 35, “that you may serve the Lord without distraction.” But he also warns, “Nevertheless he who stands steadfast in his heart, having no necessity, but has power over his own will, and has so determined in his heart that he will keep his virgin, does well” (vs. 37). That is, for the Lord’s service he will not marry his virgin girlfriend. A preferable view on “his virgin” would be “his betrothed” (ESV, NIV, HBSB note), rather than “daughter” (always in italics). The Greek word “virgin” (parthenon) refers simply to a single person as in verses 25 and 34 (see a longer explanation of this issue in Gordon Fee in First Corinthians). The single person must determine that he (or she) has the will-power to remain unmarried and can offer his or her celibacy as a sacrifice to God in undistracted service (vs. 35).

Marriage as an option. Paul also wrote, “But he who is married cares about the things of the world—how he may please his wife” (1 Cor. 11:33). Here again Paul is simply stating the facts. Most of us chose to be married and serve the Lord with a believing spouse (“only in the Lord” 7:39). This advantage in life is well explained in Ephesians 5 as a life that mirrors the Bridegroom and His bride the church. As there are advantages to the single life, there are advantages to the married life. We may remind ourselves again that we start out single in life and may end up single. God allows for remarriage after the death of a spouse for the very reason that a partner in marriage is a good thing (Rom. 7:2). If singleness is not your gift, “Let him do what he wishes; he does not sin; let them marry” (1 Cor. 7:36).

Seeking God’s will. Can a single person ask God which path he or she should take in life? I believe so. “He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord” (Prov. 18:22). John MacArthur said, “If it is God’s will for you to be married, he will provide a spouse in His perfect timing. If it is not His will, He will give you grace to live a single life” (The Divorce Dilemma). These decisions can’t be made too early in life. It will take the young adult years, when the temptations in life increase, to see what your gift may be. If you are asking whether to remain single, your question to God will be “what?” If you are asking whether to become married, your question to God will be “who?” Paul concluded by writing, “And this I say for your own profit, not that I may put a leash on you, but for what is proper, and that you may serve the Lord without distraction” (I Cor. 7:35).

Set Apart in Singleness.

God said, “It is not good that man should be alone” (Gen. 2:18). This was for several reasons: we need help in life; we desire companionship; but also because God made us sexual creatures with the physical ability to reproduce. In fact, God commanded Adam and Eve to multiply and fill the earth. Yet, because we find that singleness may be a gift from God, it could be your desire to live without the advantages of married life.

The headship of Christ. A marriage is a combination of the husband as the head and the wife as submissive to her husband. But a single person has only himself or herself. It is important therefore to remember that we all have Jesus Christ as our Head, and that we are all submissive to Him (1 Cor. 11:1-3). A woman who chooses not to marry must rely independently on her submissiveness to Christ without the advantage of a husband as her intermediate head. Elisabeth Elliot, again, wrote that though a woman is made  to be a wife, “the special vocation of the virgin is to surrender herself for service to her Lord and for the life of the world.” (“The Essence of Femininity”).

Purity to Christ and one’s future. Whether a single woman or man, and whether single by choice or situation, the single person must be pure in body and spirit. A human being must eat and sleep, but a human being doesn’t have to have a sexual life. This is why singleness is a gift from God so that a person has the “giftedness” to refrain from those desires. This includes the proper desires toward the opposite sex and the illicit desires toward the same sex (contrary to some today who argue for that attraction). God cannot bless, lead, or work through any person who is not pure in this regard, whether married or single. “Now she who is really a widow, and left alone, trusts in God and continues in supplications and prayers night and day. But she who lives in pleasure is dead while she lives. And these things command, that they may be blameless” (1 Tim. 5:5-7).

Neither life is essential. A Christian may choose singleness or marriage without sinning or being a lesser servant of God. The biblical examples, especially of Jesus, Peter, and Paul, show us that either life can be blessed. In fact, in our heavenly life, though we will know our earthly loved ones, including our beloved spouse, we will not be encumbered by the necessity to marry (Matt. 22:30). However, our earthly journey has choices with limitations. The choice to remain single may limit a man in ministry and yet may enhance a woman in missionary service. A man who works as a traveling man, perhaps an over-the-road driver, must know his limitations. A woman who lives alone must be especially careful and protective of her living situation. Widows and widowers must decide if they can live alone in their elderly years. They must also decide whether remarriage is wise for them. The single mother has other lives to consider than just her own.

The body of Christ, whether local or at large, is blessed to have many single people in it, perhaps more today than ever before. Timothy’s church in his youth was blessed to have both Lois and Eunice in it as single parents (or divided households). Timothy himself was an example of purity as a single minister (1 Tim. 4:12). Mary, Martha, and Lazarus, and other women such as Mary Magdalene, were great helpers to the Lord. There were many others including some of the Lord’s disciples. These serve as examples of how the church can be blessed by the life and ministry of singles in its midst.

GPS – Created Parenting, Created Distortion

by Rick Shrader

Note: This series will consist of five phases: Created-parenting, Pre-parenting, Parenting, Post-parenting, and Grand-parenting. Each of these phases will have four sections.

First Phase: Created Parenting

Section 4. Created Distortion – Problem

“Now the serpent was more cunning than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said to the woman, ’Has God said, ‘You shall not eat of any tree of the garden?’” (Gen. 3:1)

The Enemy

There is no doubt that the serpent was inhabited by Satan. Both Rev. 12:9 and 20:2 call him “that serpent of old.” Isaiah 14:12-17 and Ezekiel 28:11-19 have traditionally been taken by conservatives to explain Satan’s fall from heaven. Satan is real; he was originally called Lucifer (“day-star”); when he sinned he was cast out of heaven.

The time. It appears that angels were created at the first moment of creation. Ezek. 28:13 refers to the “day you were created.” When Job describes the creative acts as “when the morning stars sang together and all the sons of God shouted for joy” (38:7), we can place the creation of angels at that moment. Since God finished all creation in six days, we know Lucifer was created within that time.

The form. Satan and demons are able to take many forms (2 Cor. 11:14) and inhabit physical bodies. Satan was speaking from within the serpent at a time when he (Satan) was a fallen creature but the earthly animals were not. Eve does not seem to be surprised by the talking animal, so perhaps before the fall animals had a closer relationship to Adam and Eve than they did after the fall or as they do to us today. Adam named all these creatures personally (Gen. 2:20) which may suggest a closer relationship. Also, it was not until Gen. 9:2 that the fear of man was placed in every animal creature.

The deception. The process of the deception of Eve by Satan is well-known (doubt, distortion, denial, disobedience). 1 John 2:16 describes this as the common way of temptation. It could be said that Eve’s desires were all good but directed in the wrong way, being a violation of God’s plain prohibition. More importantly, we should remember that humanity’s fall into sin came from Adam’s partaking of the tree and not from Eve’s. She was “deceived” (2 Cor. 11:3) and was in “transgression” (1 Tim. 2:14), but we sinned in Adam (Rom. 5:12) and by Adam we all die (1 Cor. 15:22). Eve also came from Adam and sinned as part of the whole human race.

The curse. Gen. 3:14 is directed both to the serpent and to Satan. The serpent was relegated to the realm of creeping things as a reminder of what happened. The poor animal was no more culpable of the fall than all the other animals that were affected (Rom. 8:20). To Satan, on the other hand, his “seed” will always be at enmity with the woman’s seed. Since Satan could not have physical seed, this would refer to spiritual seed or progeny (John 8:44). He will be the spiritual father of lost humanity and she will be the progenitor of Messiah and His spiritual children.

The Woman

For purposes of marriage and family it is important to see what changed and what remained the same as Adam and Eve (and the serpent) were brought before God.

Her seed. The woman does not have physical seed either, though 3:15 mentions her “seed.” Her progeny (or spiritual seed) will come through the one seed, Jesus Christ (Gal. 3:19). This is the protoevangelium, or the first gospel mention. Her seed then will consist of children that she and Adam produce who will be spiritually born again. This will be through the godly line of Seth and eventually all who believe in Jesus Christ as the promised seed (Gal. 3:29). Uniquely, Jesus would be “born of a woman” (Gal. 4:4) without the physical seed of a man, and by virgin birth would be both the physical child of Mary and the promised Seed, or progeny, of Eve.

Her conception. Eve’s punishment for her sin is specifically applied to her pain in child-bearing. We know there were no children born to her at this time but we know later she bore Cain and Abel, Seth, and other “sons and daughters” (Gen. 5:4). The common question of where Cain got his wife is answered in Eve’s later daughters, there being no prohibition at that time on marrying one’s sister. In fact it was a necessity. It should be noted also that child-birth is not a miracle, the only exception being Jesus’ virgin birth. Childbirth is the most natural thing in the world and happens constantly among animals and humans. If it were a promised miracle from God it would not have a curse connected to it.

Her desire. There is a two-fold warning for both Adam and Eve by God. “Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you” (Gen. 3:16). This “desire” is not the desire of physical attraction but the desire to rule over her husband in a way contrary to the creation order of chapter two. The word “desire” is from the Hebrew word teshugah. It is used and defined in 4:7 where God is confronting Cain for his sin of murder. “Sin lies at the door. And its desire (teshugah) is for you, but you should rule over it.” Sin desired to rule over Cain but he must resist that desire. For Eve, her desire would be to rule over her husband but she must resist that desire. Adam’s part in that sin will be dealt with in the following point.

The Man

Whereas Eve’s difficult responsibility would be in painful childbirth, Adam’s difficult responsibility would be in tilling the ground. Adam was created a gardener from the beginning. “Then the LORD God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to tend and keep it” (Gen. 2:15).

His failure. Adam’s failure in the fall happened because he did not take the lead in his family and protect Eve. As we have seen, it was from Adam’s sin in eating of the forbidden tree that sin was brought to the human race. Had he protected his wife rather than following her lead, neither of them might (we don’t know for sure) have sinned at that time or in the same way.

His curse. One result of Adam’s failure would be in his response to Eve’s wrong desire. Not only would she desire to rule over her husband, but, as the text says, “he shall rule over you” (Gen. 3:16). “Rule” is from the word mashal which means to rule harshly. Whereas before, the husband and wife served God in a loving and God-ordained way, now she would desire to rule over her husband and he would respond by harshly ruling over her. Headship and submission were not part of the curse as feminism and now egalitarianism want to insist. These were plainly given to Adam and Eve as a blessing when God created them male and female.  However, the distortion of submission and headship certainly did begin after the fall.

“The Lord was warning Eve that one of the bitter consequences of her sin would be a perpetual struggle with her husband. She would attempt to usurp his authority. And he would respond by trying to impose a despotic, authoritarian rule over her that would suppress her in a way God never intended. We see those very consequences at work in the failure of millions of families to this present day.” (John MacArthur, What the Bible Says about Parenting, p. 186)

Adam’s curse also involved the ground which he was created to till. “Cursed is the ground for your sake; in toil you shall eat of it all the days of your life” (Gen. 3:17). It will be by the sweat of his brow that the ground again will produce food. Farming itself is perhaps the most biblically honored profession of man’s dominion. We see life revolving around farming in the Psalms and Proverbs, the parables and illustrations, and the general life of most people in the Bible. Now the ground is hindered from easy productivity and, due to the curse, no profession will be successful without hard work. Only in the coming millennial kingdom will the earth produce again as it did before the fall (see Psa. 67:6-7; Zech. 8:12).

His return to the ground. “In the sweat of your face you shall eat bread till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; for dust you are, and to dust you shall return” (Gen. 3:19). Solomon will add, “Then the dust will return to the earth as it was, and the spirit will return to God who gave it” (Ecc. 12:7). Adam was first a body made from the ground and then given a soul, “And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul” (Gen. 2:7).

Adam’s sin brought the separation of body and soul physically, as well as separation of man and God spiritually. Both deaths were promised as a result of disobedience. Now, each of us is dead spiritually until salvation, and when we die we will be dead physically until resurrection. Those who accept Jesus Christ as Savior will be made alive spiritually in this life. They also will be made alive (made whole again) physically at the first resurrection. Those who have not accepted Christ will never be made whole spiritually but they will be resurrected physically in the second resurrection and live in an incorruptible body eternally in the lake of fire. (see Dan. 12:2-3; John 5:29; Rev. 20:5-6)

The commission of sin by the man resulted in all humanity being born sinners in Adam. The solution to the problem comes by accepting the Seed of the woman as the propitiation for one’s inherited sin.